On paper, Apple TV+’s Fountain of Youth should be a total blast. Director Guy Ritchie has a great eye for fun action set pieces; screenwriter James Vanderbilt has a stellar track record in the genre space; and leads John Krasinski and Natalie Portman have filmographies overflowing with outrageously entertaining spectacles. So why does this action/adventure flick feel so downright middling? Though the cast certainly tries, they cannot escape a hollow script that simply regurgitates every genre trope in the book. Still, there are occasional glimmers of fun if you switch off your brain. Fountain of Youth is ultimately nothing more than a lazy amalgamation of Tomb Raider, Indiana Jones, National Treasure, and The DaVinci Code.
Roguish thief Luke (Krasinski, A Quiet Place, 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi) narrowly escapes a shootout in the opening while attempting to smuggle out a stolen painting. Ritchie immediately showcases his eye for frenetic action, culminating in a sequence where Luke leaps onto a train. But that’s just the beginning for this international scavenger hunt. For his part, Krasinski knows exactly how to play the overly sarcastic, frequently flirtatious Luke; he could probably do this in his sleep. Luke next ends up at the art gallery of his estranged sister, Charlotte (Portman, Star Wars, Black Swan), wasting no time to sweep her up into his fast-paced world.
Their mission: discover the legendary Fountain of Youth, following a series of overly convoluted puzzles until they can finally reach its hidden location. For her part, Charlotte almost immediately dismisses the silliness. Millionaire Owen (Domhnall Gleeson, Ex Machina, Star Wars) helps to rope her in. Fully funding this mission, Owen has nothing to lose but his own life. He has been diagnosed with an aggressive liver cancer, and is not long for this world. If they can find the Fountain of Youth, its restorative qualities could actually save Owen from his destined fate. Charlotte’s expertise prove valuable when it comes to identifying vital clues along the way to endlessly lead them hopping from one locale to the next.
Instead of keeping the group tight and character-based, there are a bunch of random folks that seem thrown in for no other purpose than to pad out the roster. Emulating The Mummy, an ancient order has been tasked with keeping the location of the Fountain hidden—Esme (Eiza Gonzalez, Baby Driver, Alita: Battle Angel) becomes the face of this order, as she has multiple solo encounters with Luke. Each time he inches closer to the location, he has another encounter with Esme. Also in the foreground: Jamal (Arian Moayed, Spider-Man: No Way Home, Succession), a suave inspector who aims to take Luke into custody for his various crimes. Also involved: Laz Alonso (The Boys, Wrath of Man) and Carmen Ejogo (Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, The Penguin), who pad out Owen and Luke’s treasure-hunting team. Each of them barely get a small chunk of screentime. Stanley Tucci (The Devil Wears Prada, The Lovely Bones) shows face for literally one scene. Lest we forget, there’s also Charlotte’s husband (Daniel De Bourg, Mobland, Memory) and her son (Benjamin Chivers, The Devil’s Hour, Napoleon), the latter of whom ends up inexplicably along for the ride.
There are certainly some interesting ideas here, but everything is a bit too overcooked. Esme makes for a great femme fatale. In contrast, Charlotte seems too boring, and her son does not fare much better. By the third act, emotional stakes are sidelined in favor of empty spectacle. Rather than capturing awe, the endless cycle of international locations contribute very little. Even the eventual climactic arrival at the Fountain fails to excite, bogged down by ridiculous effects. They miss the sense of wonder found in similar like-minded movies of this ilk. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade did this before and masterfully, albeit with the Holy Grail rather than the titular fountain. Less a puddle than a full body of water, Fountain of Youth looks pretty but leaves logic behind courtesy of clunky storytelling.
Open the secrets of Fountain of Youth, revealing its mysteries for Apple TV+ subscribers on Friday, May 23rd.
